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We offer personal concierge career transitioning services for veterans, law enforcement, and first responders, taking the guesswork out of resume writing, interviewing and taking the next step with you into the unknown.
You have served other people in your career, let us serve you with the kind of personalized service you deserve. We provide worldwide concierge services to the private military contracting (PMC) industry and those of you seeking high-risk environment security positions. Schedule a free call with us (at the top of the page) to see what services you need.
We will take it from here.
No matter where you are in the world.
Breathe.
Hold one.
We've got your six.
PLEASE SEND YOUR OLD, DIRTY, STINKY, ROTTEN, LOOKS REALLY BAD Resumes for a free evaluation to info@ThroatPunchResumes.com
You can also send all supporting documents to the same email address. We promise to laugh when you are not looking.
Services
Quick View
$850.00
New Resume + Cover Letter (That’s it. No Frills. Unless you want frills, in which case go to the arts and crafts shop and buy frilly things).
This is our package deal. You get a full résumé and cover letter tailored to the job description of your choice. This is what you need to order if you don’t have a résumé or cover letter and you JUST WANT TO GET ON WITH THIS DAMN ORDERING PROCESS. If you want this and some Ninja Skills Coaching, get the Basic Ninja Package.
Quick View
from $820.00
You are the embodiment of service. You are the commensurate professional and you get the job done, day AND night. How do you explain this on paper? TO CIVILIANS?! How do you even begin to translate NCOIC to a civilian? We get it done for you.
Ninja Skills packages can help you get there. These are packages based on successful techniques now used by thousands of military and law enforcement personnel to highlight skills and showcase results. The simple techniques are proven and practical. Whether you are just starting to look for work or whether you’ve been in for 25 years and have no idea where to start, you’ll gain the necessary skills and knowledge to get you great results now.
Ninja Skills is the one-on-one application of your documents in an easy and practical conversation. Get your head wrapped around what your documents are showcasing to the world.
Get your resume and cover letter professionally written- Submit a complete resume packet that best represents your military and wartime experiences.
Get your abilities and training translated into simple lay terms for potential civilian employers.
Understand the job search market and powerfully manipulate the structure to situate yourself ahead of others who have not done the work.
Apply for and be selected for jobs that fit your overall plan, taking into consideration, geography, salary, benefits, and overall quality of life.
Learn to market yourself as a powerhouse of skills, abilities, and values.
This rich resource will continue to serve you even after you find your ideal job for years to come. These are life skills you can apply anywhere, anytime! No one teaches us how to navigate this world. Are we all meant to just somehow figure it out?! Come talk to us and find out that there is an actual system and it’s a winning one at that!
Ninja: On target. Every. Single. Time. You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS a 30-minute review of your documents and what next steps you should take. Done and Done
Ninja Warrior: Smooth, quick and agile. You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS a 1 hour LIVE coaching session (also can be done over the phone/internet if you can’t meet in person). Get your most important questions answered.
Ninja Master: Gets the job done every time. You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS 2-hour LIVE coaching sessions (in person or over the phone/internet).
The Samurai: Calm, cool, collected, and into minimalism. Hasn’t killed anyone in months, and frankly, he misses it. You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS 4 hours of career coaching.
The Ronin: Don’t tell him what to do plus “we don’t need no stinkin’ badges.” You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS 8 hours of career coaching.
The Dragon: Stealthy with dragon-like reflexes. You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS 12 hours of coaching including LinkedIn and other social media hidden secrets, networking strategies (that actually work), interview skills prep including answering strategies, a foolproof plan to maintain consistency in responses and answers to the top 12 most asked questions.
EVERYTHING YOU PURCHASE IS 100% Tax-Deducible under “career services.”
Quick View
$750.00
A brand-spankin' new resume, from scratch, with all the trimmings. Order this if you don’t have a resume and you don’t want to save $150 buying the resume and cover letter package. Cover Letters are industry-standard. We don’t make the rules up, we just play them.
Quick View
$475.00
This resume just needs a light refresh and edit. He travels light, eats light and always carries a light. His light ruck contains 6 months of MREs. Never let him out of your sight.
Only order this guy ONLY if you have spoken to us first. He's a wiry little guy and can get out of hand quickly. DO NOT ORDER WITHOUT TALKING TO US FIRST.
Quick View
$600.00
This resume needs a tad more love to be complete, but has all the makings of a winner. He never thought his first single would be such a success and could use a little make-over before he hits the red carpet. He has been caught hitting the red carpet on several occasions. He once throat-punched the red carpet. DO NOT ORDER WITHOUT TALKING TO US FIRST.
Only order this guy ONLY if you have spoken to us first. He doesn't like crowds and must know where all the exits are at all times.
Quick View
$700.00
This document needs a lot of formatting, editing and overall restructuring. It's not his fault being the biggest. He was just born this way. He doesn't even exercise. He's a lot to handle.
DO NOT ORDER WITHOUT TALKING TO US FIRST..
Quick View
$250.00
Ah, the dreaded Cover Letter. Industry standard requires all resumes to be submitted with a cover letter. A Cover Letter gives the Hiring Manager a reason to read your resume. Also, by the time we are done with yours, you can use it as the email template to send your documents off digitally and not have to write the “Dear So-and-So, I am writing to blah, blah, blah so read my stuff and hire me” letter. You simply copy and paste the cover letter contents into the BODY of the email. Done and Done! Nothing could be simpler. Well, not sending one could be simpler-That’s a sure way to not get considered.
Quick View
from $400.00
All the major security contractors will need a biographical sketch of your work experience formatted and worded specifically to indicate the value-added you bring to their teams. We will work with you to create this bio to their specifications and needs. This will require you to send us detailed information about your military background, including but not limited to a long form DD214, your record brief, narratives from awards, and a brief biographical sketch (outlining where you worked, you job title, MOS and what you specifically did in that time frame). by purchasing this item you understand the process takes approximately 2 weeks to complete and understand we may have to have a couple of in-depth phone calls with you to clarify exacting details of your work experience. All sensitive documents are destroyed upon bio completion. We don't keep any records, including your final copy. The final copy is sent to you. Hang on to it. We do not keep any of it once we turn over the final document to you.
ONLY ORDER THIS IF A PMC HAS SENT YOU A REQUEST TO COMPLETE A BIO
Quick View
from $350.00
The motherlode. The Big Kahuna. The BadaBing. You know you want it. If you don't know what it is then you don't need one. The only way you know you want one is if you are told you need one. We can give it to you. The Curriculum Vitae. Get it here. Once you order, we ask you for a PLETHORA of details. This is not for the faint of heart. A post-graduate degree will be involved along with some witch’s brew.
Quick View
$97.00 every 12 months
You’ve done your job. All year. You did the recon, wrote up the plans and executed. Time and time again, everyone relied on you to come through and you did. You don’t have the time to sit down and write this up in a nice and neat resume. That’s where we come in. This is your insurance. This is your protection plan. This is us, making sure we never leave you in the lurch. The lurch is full of good ideas. In fact, that’s where the good idea fairy lives, in the lurch.
What you get in this subscription service:
1 -hour Ninja-Skills Coaching: We go over what you accomplished in the year and what experiences you would like to showcase on your resume (one we have already done for you). We can also discuss how your current experience is working out for you and discuss alternatives to where you are now. We can do this via phone, video chat or in person.
1 Resume update with work covering 30 minutes of writing. That’s A LOT of writing in the writing world. We will update your completed resume, refreshed with new experiences you provide us and ensure your resume is up to date with all the new things you’ve been up to, whether or not there were witnesses.
You pick AND schedule a time to talk to us. Subscribe to this service and we will send you a link to plan out your year. Don’t worry if your plans change. We can reschedule!
A professional resume writer and career coach with boots-on-the-ground experience, who actually gives a damn about what happens to you, making sure you’ve got your stuff in order so you can focus on what you do best-Protecting others!
All these services + benefits are valued at over $300 if you buy them separately.
TERMS
We have to have completed your resume. In other words you have to be an existing client. You can, absolutely, purchase this service as an add-on if you are buying a resume writing service from us for the first time.
Work completed on a resume update is valued at 30 minutes of writing time. If the work you need completed goes over 30 minutes, you will be charged at the hourly rate of $100/hour which is billed in 30 minute increments. That means if we do another 30 minutes of work on your refresh along with the 30 minutes (for a total of 1 hour of work) you bought in OVERWATCH, you will be billed an additional $50 per document (not a subscription increase).
Quick View
from $150.00
You just can’t decide if you want a package or not. You don’t know if you want to go PSD or Postal. You JUST WANT TO TALK TO SOMEONE! KAREN’S GETTING THE MANAGER FOR YOU! WHY ARE WE YELLING? We’ve discounted the hour-long sessions, so the more you talk, the less you pay. If you need more than what the drop down menu offers, contact us for a customized ninjutsu package.
Throat-Punch Resumes™ Services
Featured
Quick View
$200.00
The things we have seen and the things we have done.
The things that have been done to us.
Lord knows that list is long. Lord only knows.
We have a Nationally Certified Health & Wellness Coach who also happens to be Chopra certified to teach Meditation, Ayurveda (don’t worry, it’s not woo-woo), and Pranayama (breathwork) and help walk with you out of the fog and into clarity
Health and Wellness Coaching is like nothing you’ve ever experienced.
It’s not therapy (thank F*ck for that!)
Our Coach has been forward deployed and has returned to the harsh reality of no one giving a flying flip about where the soul goes to lick its wounds.
Let’s stop the 22. It starts with you getting through your thick skull that asking for help is not a weakness but a strength-That the oxygen mask goes on you first for a reason.
Come find, Task, Purpose and Motivation in a setting that allows for lickies and chewies, and you can bring your woobie
We are working on getting health insurance to pay for some of it. Yes, that’s how new Health and Wellness is in the health industry.
Each (1) quantity is for one session of coaching. If you set up a free 15-minute call with us you can talk to the coach and see if you are a good fit. Packages can be established for you based on your needs. Some people need 1 session. Some need more. Yes, the price goes down with more sessions.
The reason our clients come to us and stay with us is because we actually give a damn about what happens to you. You are not a box to be ticked. You are not some quota to be managed. You are trying to figure out the next steps in your life, and sometimes that means leaving everything behind, and sometimes that means learning not to run. As a Chopra-certified coach, Karine will walk with you through the unknown of figuring out your life’s path. Sometimes, a machete is needed, and sometimes, a scalpel. Sometimes, even crazy glue. In these sessions, we deal with past traumas, addictions, major events, upheavals, life changes, self-destructive patterns, setting wellness goals, and creating a new you out of the ashes of the old.
Karine is a National Board-Certified Health & Wellness Coach and Chopra-certified Coach and Meditation, Ayurveda, and Pranayama Educator. Don’t let the Sanskrit scare you. This is the closest thing to “how the hell did you do that?” you are going to get with someone who has been forward deployed, gotten hurt, and gotten the surgeries. There’s no fun at the bottom of the bottle. There’s no love at the end of the pill stack. Divorce is costly, and the price is always paid. Come figure out how to recreate yourself and heal in a place where no one can see you. Emerge a warrior. Again.
Quick View
$850.00
New Resume + Cover Letter (That’s it. No Frills. Unless you want frills, in which case go to the arts and crafts shop and buy frilly things).
This is our package deal. You get a full résumé and cover letter tailored to the job description of your choice. This is what you need to order if you don’t have a résumé or cover letter and you JUST WANT TO GET ON WITH THIS DAMN ORDERING PROCESS. If you want this and some Ninja Skills Coaching, get the Basic Ninja Package.
Quick View
from $820.00
You are the embodiment of service. You are the commensurate professional and you get the job done, day AND night. How do you explain this on paper? TO CIVILIANS?! How do you even begin to translate NCOIC to a civilian? We get it done for you.
Ninja Skills packages can help you get there. These are packages based on successful techniques now used by thousands of military and law enforcement personnel to highlight skills and showcase results. The simple techniques are proven and practical. Whether you are just starting to look for work or whether you’ve been in for 25 years and have no idea where to start, you’ll gain the necessary skills and knowledge to get you great results now.
Ninja Skills is the one-on-one application of your documents in an easy and practical conversation. Get your head wrapped around what your documents are showcasing to the world.
Get your resume and cover letter professionally written- Submit a complete resume packet that best represents your military and wartime experiences.
Get your abilities and training translated into simple lay terms for potential civilian employers.
Understand the job search market and powerfully manipulate the structure to situate yourself ahead of others who have not done the work.
Apply for and be selected for jobs that fit your overall plan, taking into consideration, geography, salary, benefits, and overall quality of life.
Learn to market yourself as a powerhouse of skills, abilities, and values.
This rich resource will continue to serve you even after you find your ideal job for years to come. These are life skills you can apply anywhere, anytime! No one teaches us how to navigate this world. Are we all meant to just somehow figure it out?! Come talk to us and find out that there is an actual system and it’s a winning one at that!
Ninja: On target. Every. Single. Time. You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS a 30-minute review of your documents and what next steps you should take. Done and Done
Ninja Warrior: Smooth, quick and agile. You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS a 1 hour LIVE coaching session (also can be done over the phone/internet if you can’t meet in person). Get your most important questions answered.
Ninja Master: Gets the job done every time. You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS 2-hour LIVE coaching sessions (in person or over the phone/internet).
The Samurai: Calm, cool, collected, and into minimalism. Hasn’t killed anyone in months, and frankly, he misses it. You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS 4 hours of career coaching.
The Ronin: Don’t tell him what to do plus “we don’t need no stinkin’ badges.” You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS 8 hours of career coaching.
The Dragon: Stealthy with dragon-like reflexes. You get 1 Resume and 1 Cover Letter PLUS 12 hours of coaching including LinkedIn and other social media hidden secrets, networking strategies (that actually work), interview skills prep including answering strategies, a foolproof plan to maintain consistency in responses and answers to the top 12 most asked questions.
EVERYTHING YOU PURCHASE IS 100% Tax-Deducible under “career services.”
Quick View
$750.00
A brand-spankin' new resume, from scratch, with all the trimmings. Order this if you don’t have a resume and you don’t want to save $150 buying the resume and cover letter package. Cover Letters are industry-standard. We don’t make the rules up, we just play them.
Quick View
$475.00
This resume just needs a light refresh and edit. He travels light, eats light and always carries a light. His light ruck contains 6 months of MREs. Never let him out of your sight.
Only order this guy ONLY if you have spoken to us first. He's a wiry little guy and can get out of hand quickly. DO NOT ORDER WITHOUT TALKING TO US FIRST.
Quick View
$600.00
This resume needs a tad more love to be complete, but has all the makings of a winner. He never thought his first single would be such a success and could use a little make-over before he hits the red carpet. He has been caught hitting the red carpet on several occasions. He once throat-punched the red carpet. DO NOT ORDER WITHOUT TALKING TO US FIRST.
Only order this guy ONLY if you have spoken to us first. He doesn't like crowds and must know where all the exits are at all times.
Quick View
$700.00
This document needs a lot of formatting, editing and overall restructuring. It's not his fault being the biggest. He was just born this way. He doesn't even exercise. He's a lot to handle.
DO NOT ORDER WITHOUT TALKING TO US FIRST..
Quick View
$250.00
Ah, the dreaded Cover Letter. Industry standard requires all resumes to be submitted with a cover letter. A Cover Letter gives the Hiring Manager a reason to read your resume. Also, by the time we are done with yours, you can use it as the email template to send your documents off digitally and not have to write the “Dear So-and-So, I am writing to blah, blah, blah so read my stuff and hire me” letter. You simply copy and paste the cover letter contents into the BODY of the email. Done and Done! Nothing could be simpler. Well, not sending one could be simpler-That’s a sure way to not get considered.
Quick View
from $400.00
All the major security contractors will need a biographical sketch of your work experience formatted and worded specifically to indicate the value-added you bring to their teams. We will work with you to create this bio to their specifications and needs. This will require you to send us detailed information about your military background, including but not limited to a long form DD214, your record brief, narratives from awards, and a brief biographical sketch (outlining where you worked, you job title, MOS and what you specifically did in that time frame). by purchasing this item you understand the process takes approximately 2 weeks to complete and understand we may have to have a couple of in-depth phone calls with you to clarify exacting details of your work experience. All sensitive documents are destroyed upon bio completion. We don't keep any records, including your final copy. The final copy is sent to you. Hang on to it. We do not keep any of it once we turn over the final document to you.
ONLY ORDER THIS IF A PMC HAS SENT YOU A REQUEST TO COMPLETE A BIO
Quick View
from $350.00
The motherlode. The Big Kahuna. The BadaBing. You know you want it. If you don't know what it is then you don't need one. The only way you know you want one is if you are told you need one. We can give it to you. The Curriculum Vitae. Get it here. Once you order, we ask you for a PLETHORA of details. This is not for the faint of heart. A post-graduate degree will be involved along with some witch’s brew.
Quick View
$97.00 every 12 months
You’ve done your job. All year. You did the recon, wrote up the plans and executed. Time and time again, everyone relied on you to come through and you did. You don’t have the time to sit down and write this up in a nice and neat resume. That’s where we come in. This is your insurance. This is your protection plan. This is us, making sure we never leave you in the lurch. The lurch is full of good ideas. In fact, that’s where the good idea fairy lives, in the lurch.
What you get in this subscription service:
1 -hour Ninja-Skills Coaching: We go over what you accomplished in the year and what experiences you would like to showcase on your resume (one we have already done for you). We can also discuss how your current experience is working out for you and discuss alternatives to where you are now. We can do this via phone, video chat or in person.
1 Resume update with work covering 30 minutes of writing. That’s A LOT of writing in the writing world. We will update your completed resume, refreshed with new experiences you provide us and ensure your resume is up to date with all the new things you’ve been up to, whether or not there were witnesses.
You pick AND schedule a time to talk to us. Subscribe to this service and we will send you a link to plan out your year. Don’t worry if your plans change. We can reschedule!
A professional resume writer and career coach with boots-on-the-ground experience, who actually gives a damn about what happens to you, making sure you’ve got your stuff in order so you can focus on what you do best-Protecting others!
All these services + benefits are valued at over $300 if you buy them separately.
TERMS
We have to have completed your resume. In other words you have to be an existing client. You can, absolutely, purchase this service as an add-on if you are buying a resume writing service from us for the first time.
Work completed on a resume update is valued at 30 minutes of writing time. If the work you need completed goes over 30 minutes, you will be charged at the hourly rate of $100/hour which is billed in 30 minute increments. That means if we do another 30 minutes of work on your refresh along with the 30 minutes (for a total of 1 hour of work) you bought in OVERWATCH, you will be billed an additional $50 per document (not a subscription increase).
Quick View
from $150.00
You just can’t decide if you want a package or not. You don’t know if you want to go PSD or Postal. You JUST WANT TO TALK TO SOMEONE! KAREN’S GETTING THE MANAGER FOR YOU! WHY ARE WE YELLING? We’ve discounted the hour-long sessions, so the more you talk, the less you pay. If you need more than what the drop down menu offers, contact us for a customized ninjutsu package.
Services & Packages
Other Services
Featured
Quick View
$8.50
Free E-Copy $0.00
Get printed copies of your documents on Southworth Linen Resume Paper. Southworth is endorsed by the National Resume Writers Association and happens to be the same brand of paper President Lincoln used to accept Stephen Douglas’s debate.
Did you know that résumés should only be printed on résumé paper? People print stuff out on regular paper all the time. Doesn’t mean employers are not noticing.
Each additional copy is going to run you an extra $2.00 Or get yourself down to your office supply and ask for resume paper.
Throat-Punch Resumes™ Events
Ft. Bragg Area, Task, Purpose, and Motivation for the 21st Century Warrior Coming Autumn/Winter 2019
Time, Date and Details Will Be Updated in September
View Past Events:
Featured
Contact(less) Throat-Punch
Hours
Sunday: Closed
Monday: 9:00 am–7:00 pm
Tuesday: 9:00 am–7:00 pm
Wednesday: 9:00 am–7:00 pm
Thursday: 9:00 am–7:00 pm
Friday: 9:00 am–7:00 pm
Saturday: Closed
The things we have seen and the things we have done.
The things that have been done to us.
Lord knows that list is long. Lord only knows.
We have a Nationally Certified Health & Wellness Coach who also happens to be Chopra certified to teach Meditation, Ayurveda (don’t worry, it’s not woo-woo), and Pranayama (breathwork) and help walk with you out of the fog and into clarity
Health and Wellness Coaching is like nothing you’ve ever experienced.
It’s not therapy (thank F*ck for that!)
Our Coach has been forward deployed and has returned to the harsh reality of no one giving a flying flip about where the soul goes to lick its wounds.
Let’s stop the 22. It starts with you getting through your thick skull that asking for help is not a weakness but a strength-That the oxygen mask goes on you first for a reason.
Come find, Task, Purpose and Motivation in a setting that allows for lickies and chewies, and you can bring your woobie
We are working on getting health insurance to pay for some of it. Yes, that’s how new Health and Wellness is in the health industry.
Each (1) quantity is for one session of coaching. If you set up a free 15-minute call with us you can talk to the coach and see if you are a good fit. Packages can be established for you based on your needs. Some people need 1 session. Some need more. Yes, the price goes down with more sessions.
The reason our clients come to us and stay with us is because we actually give a damn about what happens to you. You are not a box to be ticked. You are not some quota to be managed. You are trying to figure out the next steps in your life, and sometimes that means leaving everything behind, and sometimes that means learning not to run. As a Chopra-certified coach, Karine will walk with you through the unknown of figuring out your life’s path. Sometimes, a machete is needed, and sometimes, a scalpel. Sometimes, even crazy glue. In these sessions, we deal with past traumas, addictions, major events, upheavals, life changes, self-destructive patterns, setting wellness goals, and creating a new you out of the ashes of the old.
Karine is a National Board-Certified Health & Wellness Coach and Chopra-certified Coach and Meditation, Ayurveda, and Pranayama Educator. Don’t let the Sanskrit scare you. This is the closest thing to “how the hell did you do that?” you are going to get with someone who has been forward deployed, gotten hurt, and gotten the surgeries. There’s no fun at the bottom of the bottle. There’s no love at the end of the pill stack. Divorce is costly, and the price is always paid. Come figure out how to recreate yourself and heal in a place where no one can see you. Emerge a warrior. Again.